Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Those Damn Girl Scout Cookies

The Girl Scout Cookies come this weekend.

As part of my lenten observation, I will eat those cookies, but I will plan accordingly. I will note the serving size on the package and I will only eat one serving. Can I do it this year? Can I refrain from eating the entire box of Carmel DeLights in one sitting? See, the thing about Girl Scout Cookies is that, well, they're good. I can't feel completely terrible about eating them, because they're not this nasty crap that you're eating just because its there. They are good. People love them. They buy crates of them and freeze them throughout the year, they're so good. And who can resist that little girl in her uniform, with her awkward sales pitch that would make Tom Peters cringe? Especially when that uniformed brownie is YOUR little girl? "No, honey, I'm not buying any from you because I'm on a diet" won't do. Oh, and please, Girl Scouts. Nice try with the "well, you can simply donate the money here and skip the cookies." Or the "reduced fat lemon pastry cremes." You look at the nutrition facts and learn that two cookies are 3 points, whether or not they're Carmel Delights or Lemon Pastry Cremes (which are good, BTW. Don't let the "reduced fat" scare you off). Oh, and the mint cookies. Does anybody really only eat two Girl Scout Mint cookies?

And don't get me started on the Boy Scouts and their popcorn. Best damn microwave popcorn money can buy. Even the lowfat variety is good. Its even better than Paul Newman's, and very few things are better than Paul Newman's anything.

Why can't all charities sell food this good? On second thought, I'm glad they don't.

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